two hippo's were in the lake. The water was up to their eyes. What did one hippo say to the other? I don't know why but i keep thinking it's tuesday.

I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120 mph car crash

Q: What's your dog's name ? A: Dog. Q: What's your cat's name ? A: Cat. Q: What's your dick's name A: Pinky

Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

How many blondes does it take to walk into a bar? One I guess. I don't know if I understand the question.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

I'm currently on a seafood diet That is, I only eat seafood.

Q: Whats about two feet in width and length with purple veins throbbing at the sides? A: A midget slowly dying of frostbite

Terraria

Roses are red Violets are? blue Lets eat poo I know you want to

Knock Knock Whose there? The pizza you ordered That's weird, the Pizza I ordered shouldn't be able to talk

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Doctor" "Interrupting Doc-" "You have Cancer'

Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

VITAMIN C!

How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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