A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

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Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

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What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

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Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

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why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

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If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm a skitsofrantic, and so am I

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Susie.????

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Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

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4 gay men walk into a bar,but there is only one stool..... What do they do? Turn it over

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

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Q: Wy couldn't the T-rex grab the other Dinosor? A: Because he is extinct.

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Today, my house burned to the ground. FML.

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"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

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what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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( . Y . )

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"hey woody can i ask you a question" "sure buzz" "why is it your name is woody but they use me as a vibrator"

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What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? A dead bird

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I am blind.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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