What's black, white and red all over? A nun that's just been shot.

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What's ugly and has shit smeared over its teeth? Smelly McD (He also wears bin bag clothes)

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What is worse than the holocaust Nothing it was fine with the Jews in camps burning and dying

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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If I met your mom before you was born, you would still be born.

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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Why did the tomato turn red? The salad pulled out a gun.

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what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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this is stupid .... yep

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what is the difference between a blond and a red head? one is has blond hair and one has red hair

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Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwimg out all the W&Ws

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You know whats better than 24? 25

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Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

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Q: How many Jews can fit in a car? A: 5 in a standard mid sized sedan, or 7 in an SUV

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What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless

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What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

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A man is taking a shower in jail where he drops the soap. He proceeds to pick the soap up and cleans the rest of his body, puts his orange jumpsuit on and returns to his cell.

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I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

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A Mexican man, an American man, and an Italian man go to a bridge. The mexican said "we have too much of this in our country!" and throws pasta into the water. The Mexican man says "we have to much of this in out country!" and throws a taco into the water. The American throws in the Mexican man and says "we have to much of these in our country!"

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A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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what do u do if a women serves you lunch in the living room? u tighten the chain!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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