What's big, an instrument, has black and white keys, and is located in the bathroom? I don't know. A piano. But why in the bathroom? Don't tell me how to furnish my house.

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what the difference between Obama and osama bin laden nothing

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

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Q: What's purple and flies? A: Super Grape

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How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

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Evolution is real. Why? Pikachu evolves.

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In Soviet Russia, Stalin kills you

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A sad horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse answers "My wife was just diagnosed with terminal cancer."

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Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

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What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

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-Can I ask you one question? -Yes. -Thank you.

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What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled ice cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

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What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

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Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

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a dad farts in the woods nothing else happens

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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