Roses are red, Sometimes they're white. Or pink. Or yellow. There are roses of many colors.

A horse walks into a bar. He was blind.

roses are black violets are grey... im color blind sorry

Why didn't the Baby wake up? Because it was dead

Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory? She made skittles.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

A man walks into a bar. He gets wasted and forgets the punchline.

Gay's

What do you call a seagull that flew into the bay? Wet.

Why did Sally fall off a tree? She wanted to get down

Where did Susie go when the bomb went of? Everywhere?

so... how about that airplane food

Your momma is so stupid, because she didn't get a proper education

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Pizza guy. Just a minute, I have to grab my wallet.

what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

Am I a cat? No, I am a human; cat's cannot type.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

When is a door not a door? Never, a door is an inanimate object and is thus incapable of transforming.

know whats funnier than 24? 25.

What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...