If at first you don't succeed, there's a very substantial probability that you failed.

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Horton Hears... Rape and violence and doesn't do anything about it.

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knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

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People could crack eggs but Chuck Norris could crack chickens.

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Why did bobby fall of the swing? He had no arms -Knock knock -Who's there? -Bobby -But how? -I knocked with my diick -Oh

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: Because of Kevin Spacey's chilling performance.

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1: Knock. Knock. 2: Don't come in I'm naked.

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A black guy walks into a bar... he sits down and has a drink

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what did the boy say to the girl? make me a sandwich.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

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The Cubs are going to win the world series this year

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A man walks by with a bat. A little girl crosses the street. He hits her with it because she is a little shit. A homeless atheist sees and reports it immeaditately to the authorities because it was child abuse.

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Two men are sitting in a pub. One man turns to the other and says: 'Last night I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife's house.' The other man replies: 'Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidize her drug habit.'

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The bartender says ok, then hands him a pistol, then the man shoots the bartender and kills him.

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Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's alright now.

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How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

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Life is an elephant, get married.

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your family die in a fire.

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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what did the police do when they saw an arab running towards a building? Watched him run by because he was probably late for something

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What's worse than eating cows. Death

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What do you call Americas first black president? A change.

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What do you call a pen sitting on a counter? A righting utensil not being currently used.

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i jack off in the school bathroom #yolo -toby limbers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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