Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

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BOYS ARE DUMB AND THEY SMELL FUNNY AND IM ANGRY

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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Why did the man fart? He didn't. Stop being so dirty-minded.

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Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

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What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

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Shark week? More like owl week. Hoo!

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Why did the Taxi crash? The cab driver was trying to remove the frog stapled to his face.

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What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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