What's worse than catching aids? - already having aids.

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Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

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like if your cool

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

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What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

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question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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A jewish boy walks past a quarter on the ground..

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Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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An american, canadian, and mexican are on a skyscraper. Canadian: (pulls off maple leaf) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) Mexican: (pulls out burrito) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) American: (looks at mexican) we have to many of these in our country (pushes mexican off building)

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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Whats more fun that a hooker - her mother

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A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A comment saying "I don't think that's an anti-joke"

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What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

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Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

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A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

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What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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