The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

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What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Where did Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

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Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

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What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

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why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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What do you call a bunch black people falling off a cliff? A mudslide! What do you call a bunch of white people falling off a cliff? An avalanch!

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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