What would a man say if you urinated all over his legs? WHAT THE DEUCE?

Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

If you walked into a grocery store right in the middle of Cuba what won't you see? The missing Malaysian MH370 Boeing.

Want to hear an orphan joke? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents

So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

Three people are stranded on an island. They didn't want to eat each other because they were friends. They died of starvation.

roses are red violets are blue cover me im goin in

What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications/programs, thus causing the game Jetman on Facebook to lag.

Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

a guy walks into a bar. he suffered a severe concussion. BECAUSE THE BAR A POLE

A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances they had to go home early one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies, "my wife has cancer."

A: What are the nine most terrifying words in the English dictionary? B: What are they? A: I'm from the government and i'm here to help

Doctor: I'm sorry about your disease, young man. It looks like your time is up. Man: NO! How much time to I have? Doctor: Five. Man: Five years? Five months? Five weeks? Doctor: Four... Three...

What did the pear say to the apple? Fred, you delusions are getting worse and i'm getting a divorce.

Why'd Mary fall off her bike? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Mary... O.o

There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

Whats blue and flufft Answer: Blue Fluff

The GOV and the WHO?

LAST COMMENT? DISGUSTIIIING! NO YOU TAKE IT!

What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

Roses are red Violets are blue If you need a poo.... ...hold it in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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