what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

Knock, knock! Who's there? orange? orange who? orange ya glad i didn't say your family was dead.

Whats red but smells like blue paint? Red paint

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

Why did the Chicken cross the Road? To get to the other side! (To fully appreciate the subtle nuisances of this joke, you really have to be a chicken.)

What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

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What do you do when you're given a phonebook? You ask for their name.

How can you tell the difference between a black man and a white man? Quite easily actually.

Why Do Black People Love Watermelon? Because Its A Delicious Fruit.

What did the two best friends do before the asteroid hit the Earth? They hugged each other goodbye.

What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

Rylan Clark

Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get to chicken to have safe sex

That was slightly painful. I would appreciate it if you would stop such actions in the future

How do you greet a small mexican man at Chuck E. Cheese? Whatsup Jose

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The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

Are those two people having sex? Yes, I think they are.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -None, they will pay for somebody else to do it

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

How many ants are in the kitchen? None. We killed them all.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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