Why do Mexicans always have heart burn? Because the food is spicy.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What can you use a broken watch for? A compass.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

i used to take arrows to the knee,til i took one to the balls.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To go to work. And be sexually harassed. For 70 cents on the dollar.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you so much That is a an example of the 2nd person and the identification of plants and their colors

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Oh good I thought you wouldn't make it.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why couldn't the bartender sell alcoholic beverages? He got fired

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

thumb_up thumb_down -1

im a barbie girl in a barbie world !!!! no your not its not phisicly possible for a plastic doll to have any form of feelings !!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why are large breasts so awesome? Cleavage is sexually attractive to both men and women

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the different between a white guy and a black guy? The white guy makes his money, and the black guy steels the white guys money.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did the man open the car? He opened in.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? i don't know, he hasn't unwrapped it yet

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Im 8 years old, sometimes I get sick, and I take medicine and it makes me feel better. My daughter has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Ryan Maharaj is INDIAN!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

taking out the trash... at night

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops