- Anti Joke

Two penguins are in a bathtub, one penguin asks the other "can you pass the soap?" the other penguin says "what do I look like? A toaster?"

Dancing Potatoe!

I had a dream, then i died in it and now i'm dead but who cares, how are you ?

Why was Hellen Kellers leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

A man is driving down a back country road in an old beat up car going 30 mph when he notices a black horse and a white horse keeping pace with him. They keep up with him for a few miles before passing him and turning into a farm on the road. The man is quite impressed with the horses speed and follows them to the farmer and offers the farmer living there the horses in exchange for the car. The farmer says the horses are bad luck but accepts the trade, and the man walks off with the horses. The man then enters the horses in a big horse race and puts a lot of money on them. The horses immediately take the lead and are about to finish the race when the black horse trips and the white horse goes back to pick him up and end up losing. The man is furious and returns the horses to the farmer and gets his car back. The next day another man is driving in a nicer car down the same road going 50 mph when the black horse and the white horse run right past his car. Impressed with the horses speed the man trades his car to the farmer who warns him about the horses. Ignoring the farmer's warning the man enters the horses in a new race. The horses once again take the lead and are close to finishing first and second when the black horse trips and the white horse goes and picks him up again once again losing their lead. The man angrily returns the horses in exchange for his car. The next day a third man drives down the same road in a brand new sports car. While he's testing the limits of the car the horses catch up to him and run with him. Surprised by the speed of the horses the man speeds up in his car but the horses manage to keep up. The horses eventually run past the man and turn into their farm, and the man looks down and realizes that the horses had been running faster than 120 mph. The man goes to the farmer and offers his car in exchange for the horses. The farmer accepts but gives the man the same warning he gave the two men earlier. The new man just like the other two men ignores the warning and enters the horses into a race and bets a lot of money on them. This time the horse take the lead out of the gate but feet from the finish line the white horse trips and falls. The black horse seeing this goes back and helps him up once again losing the race. The man is disgusted and releases the horses into the city in hopes that they'll die out there. The two horses are wander into a bar, and the bartender looks at them and says: "hey you two why the long face?"

If we all evolved from apes. Abbie didnt go that far

why was the boy sad He had a frog stapled to his face

what do get when you blend zebra, a cow and a walrus? A not very good smoothie

im a straight dude and all the gay dudes at school make fun of me oh wait i wrote that backwards

Hi my name is Jim

So my girlfriend says I'm a pedophile. What does she know she's nine.

Why is a black man fat? Because he eats a lot.

Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he didn't have any arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Jimmy was a Potato.

What did the fish say when it hit the wall? "Dam."

What's up? A direction...

What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

Wow, that makes your name a lot more comfortable to say... Not type, and you seem to be more sensitive than non-red hair girls. Besides its really nice, why do you dye it? Is it like red or ginger?

What do you do when jews take over your country? Invade Poland.

Why did the woman fall off the skateboard? She hit a rock.

How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

How could you ever watch a man hit another man and say nothing? UFC is on at 9:00pm.

Joe Biden

Q: What has four legs and an arm. A: A pitbull on a playground

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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