Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

??????????????(?)/// ????????(^0^)/

A peice of dust floats into a bar. Its a peice of dust so no one notices it.

Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

Why did the man have cold feet on his wedding day? The wedding was outside in the winter.

what do you call a room full of one terrorist and several babies? dead babies

Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

Knock Knock Who's there? Somebody who wants to come in.

how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

Dozer has a soul

How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

Bobby walked into a bar. He was then escorted out of the bar and arrested because he was underage.

How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

three men walked into a bar, can't believe know one noticed it.

No.

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A: You can't wear cleats on a trampoline.

You know George Washington? He died.

Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is black.

Working hard or hardly working????

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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