A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

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3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

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There are two fish in a tank and one says to the other, "how do we drive this thing?"

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

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Bin laden walks into a bar oh wait he's dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

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Why did the girl miss her date? She got killed.

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Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

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What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

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Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

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What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

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Knock Knock. What's up? Oh, nothing much, you? Yeah, you know, same old, same old. Cool.

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What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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what do the parents of a starved family do? kill their kids chop them up into little pieces and eat them.

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what is blue and fuzzy? Blue Fuzz

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What did Helen Keller say to her friend? Nothing. If you didn't know, she was deaf and blind so she had to use Sign Language.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops