What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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You having friends.

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What did the chicken say to the.... nevermind

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i have Alzheimers, Roses are red

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

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An old lady at an atm told me to check her balance So i pushed her over

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Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

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How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

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A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red, HOLY SHIT THE GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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Jumping out of an airplane is a once in a lifetime expeirence.

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What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

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Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Two women that are both blonde were driving together down a hill. Suddenly, the brakes fail and one blonde says "Oh no, we're gonna crash. The blonde in the passenger seat says "Don't worry, there's a stop sign." Then the blonde driver says "I'm not dumb okay, that's yield sign.

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A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

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how do you kill a baby? introduce it to alice cooper

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what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

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How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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