What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

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Why did Lucy fall out of the tree? Because she sting by a wasp.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Do you have a minute to talk about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

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What do you call a person without a heart? Not alive.

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what did the photographer tell the model? You're ugly.

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How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

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Roses are red My bulb is blue My pants are extending When I look at you

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bronson watt walks into a bar.

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What did one theoretical physicist say to another theoretical physicist? Hey there Bill, how's Nancy and the kids doing?

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Knock knock Whos there Bill O hey bill

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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When life gives you lemons....you probably just FOUND lemons...

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis

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Remember when the new jokes on this sight actually used to be funny?

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Phil sees a hitchhiker wandering past his car on the sidewalk. He asks Phil if he can take him to his house, and Phil says no, and keeps driving. Six seconds later the hitchhiker is crossing the street in search of somebody else, when he is hit by a bus and dies.

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How did the old man feel when he couldn't have sex? Viagravated

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Women's Rights

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Your mom's so fat, I tried to rape her but couldn't find her p**** and gave up. Instead I decided to take her out to dinner. We enjoyed a lovely meal and I spent the rest of the night trimming her fat with a vegetable peeler while she screamed and bled all over the floor.

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What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

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A rooster is standing on top of a pointed bird house. He lays an egg. Which side does the egg fall, the left or the right? I don't care, I'm a vegetarian.

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hey timmy, wanna go to Disneyworld?! tough. *10 seconds later* still no timmy

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Roses are red Violets are red Your flowers are red Yes set your garden on fire

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Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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