What is the definition of a "crying shame"? Very similar to the definition of a shame, but moreso.

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What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

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What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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why did the chicken cross the bread? because chicken salad

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why did the little boy cry about his dog, it was hit by a train.

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What do you call a New Zealander with 1000 lovers? A shepard

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Why did the Grandad teabag his Grandson? Because he likes dipping his balls into the mouths of his Grandchildren; as if they were a teabag and his mouth was a mug.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Knock Knock Who's there? St. Judes St.Judes who ? St.Judes Research Hospital calling. Give me money, I've got cancer kids dying

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Q: How many black guys does it take to black top a driveway? A: I can't give you a definitive answer unless I know the area to be covered, the thickness of material to be applied, and the capabilities of each individual working that particular day.

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Doctor, Doctor, I feel like I don't know anyone... Uh...who are you?

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

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what did the little boy get from santa claus on christmas? nothing santa isnt real

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What number is funnier than 23? 24.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a cannibal and like to burn people.

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Why didn't the man get to see his family on Christmas? He was blind.

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked.

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Quantum Mechanics is so difficult to understand, somewhere Stephen Hawking just walked into a bar.

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What is the pirate's favorite letter? Z.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? EMS - your pregnant wife died it a car crash

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Two blondes walk into a bar. You'd have thought one of them would have seen it.

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Lil' Johnny was happily swinging on the swings when all of a sudden...... ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> FLYING DAGGERS!!!

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That's what SHE said!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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