Mr Jones, we're sending you to a mental health clinic

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Our experimental treatment for Anterograde amnesia has failed. I will inform your family.

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Why can't Tom Maynard play cricket anymore Because he's dead

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A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

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What would you do if the house you're sitting in now exploded? Nothing really, you would have died a horrible death.

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A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

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What's worse than finding a hair in your soup? Slavery.

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How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

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Lets Go Lakers!

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what did the caterpillar say to the butterfly? Im gonna turn into you.

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roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

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What did Little Jojo get for Hanukah? Nothing he is Muslim.

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why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

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What is the definition of a "crying shame"? Very similar to the definition of a shame, but moreso.

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Nero, thank you for this opportunity, I desire to join the shadows, I left a thumbs up. Michelle

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I have aids

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why did the chicken cross the bread? because chicken salad

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What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

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Q: What's the difference between lucky charms and a baby? A: One is magically delicious and the other is a breakfast serial.

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A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

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What did the walrus say to the Penguin. It said MAHHRGH. because walruses can't really talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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