Whats the worst thing about walking through a meadow of dead babies My boner

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interupting cow Interu--- MOOOOOO!!

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LAST COMMENT? DISGUSTIIIING! NO YOU TAKE IT!

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to severely injure a human.

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( . Y . )

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What is worse then finding an apple in your worm? Not a lot.

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A chicken crosses the road as a car comes by. The driver pumps the brakes and stops the car just before hitting the chicken. The chicken crosses the road safely. Onward, my noble steed !

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What do you call an asian who celebrates Christmas? A christan

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Why was the dwarf nicknamed The Anaconda? Because everybody loves a bit of irony.

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Why did everyone at school think that Susan was so hot? They set her on fire.

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Want some candy? Lol jk get in my van.

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I was driving to Wal-Mart the other day and I saw a black man in a white Murcielago. I thought to myself that he must be doing good. Because everything he owns is white..... dick

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8

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How Many R's are in Terrence? two, how could there be 6?

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Top Gear USA

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what do dead babies and turkeys have in common? you eat them on ocasions

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The dewey decimal system

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? To get to the other side.

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A dog walks into a bar. the owner of the bar didn't allow animal in his bar and he helped the dog outside again

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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Q: whats worse that sucking at piano A: the world blowing up

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Alice, seriously do as I say, I lived with the man for over 16 years, those are not hallucinations, its PTSD, without ritalin he will just go trough that agony for nothing, not coffee not chocolate or any of that, anything that helps his focus. Seriously do not be a bitch Alice, listen to him and do as he says. Its not the first time people think he is having hallucinations when his eyes start moving back and forth like crazy, he is not seeing things, he is experiencing this as if they where real, and just because he can stay in that state for days, does not mean he is meant to go trough that kind of agony because of your ethics or caring or whatever your hesitation might be, the man can go without food for weeks if he has to, but not after you sneak trash like Zopiclone into his system. That was a mistake of yours, make up for it Alice, or ill make you pay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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