your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Your mom is so fat, it is unlikely that she will be able to survive the month without experimental liposuction and heart surgery, and even then her outlook is bleak. I am so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new home? No. Neither has he....

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red, bikers are blur.....I love you ( drunk texting )

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: What happened when three lions escaped from the zoo? A: Animal patrol came and tranquilized all three.. Unfortunantly one of the lions died from to much tranq.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Pi = Pie, something everybody likes.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the retarded asian dolphin eat for breakfast? A big bowl of shit

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

four little monkeys jumping on the bed... one fell of and bumped his head... mama called the doctor and the doctor said... im calling child protection services.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Here's a joke, a black man walks into a store and buys something. that's it.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Hey dude, wanna come with me!!!! Sure, where? ON YOUR FACE!!!!!! -_- ........ok sure why not

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A black teenage girl wants to get a job, unfortunately she is chained to a fence, beaten, and called a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's worse than Fantasy Basketball? Playing Fantasy WNBA.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

4 black people in a car drive of a cliff. the sad thing is there was a extra seat.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Man 1: Nock-nock Man 2: Please leave my place of residence

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why was the frog sad..... because it had a science lesson with the year 10s about the insides of animals

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Ching Chong Bing Bong.. Yoyao? Dat U?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

My mom gave me a quarter. I tryed to spend it on bubblegum but 7-11 said no...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops