Why i Hate people. They are alive. The are breathing. The are near me.

A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

666

What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

I am darkness, soon I shall rule the world, those of you that desire to serve me thumb this up, those of you that desire eternal fear beyond your imagination, thumb me down. Moral: Try thinking of me and thinking "he is crazy", in order to unlock the secrets behind spontaneous human combustion.

why did the black guy win a gold medal in the olympics? hard work, dedication and determanation! what no one else can be bothered to do anymore because of all this new technology and stuff!! get of your arse and do something active. NOW!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

What's brown, liquid and bad for your health in large doses? Did you guess: Coca Cola? Soda? Beer? Pepsi? Wrong. It's beer. Did this Anti-joke sound pretentious? Don't worry, you're not the only one.

Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

I believe that as long as we do not change, as we decide to believe in ourselves and use our strength and potential, all that is left, is to see which side fate favors. Maybe we are meant to survive trough our strength and belief in ourselves and each other, or maybe we are, or will eventually end up as the last people of our kind, and fade away from life, proving that those that trust in the corrupt, where better than us. Suddenly I feel so alone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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