how do you wake lady gaga up? you punch-her-face

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How much did the Holla Cost?

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Want to hear a dead baby joke? Abortion

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did Chad find dead people all over the playground? Ask him, it's not like he's pointing a gun at your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: What do you give a woman with everything? Nothing. You own nothing to give.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Cows go moo.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Waseem is not a funny guy!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Whas the difference between a boy going to a camp and a jewish boy going to camp? The jewish boys does not come back.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the koala bear fall outta the tree? He died. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?? He was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?? He had no arms. Why did the fourth koala fall out of the tree?? He thought it was a race to the bottom. Why did the fifth koala fall out of the tree?? Peer Pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: 9/11 jumpers 200 stories in 5 seconds

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Hitler.. Hitlar... Hillar... Hillary Clinton

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the parrot fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

say this really fast dick chick, chick, dick, dick chick,chick dick, dick chick if you cant like it

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the colonel say to the soldier before he got into the army tank? Get in.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Matt Damon

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

thumb_up thumb_down +24

When do scientologists go to church? When they are done looking at porn.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's Brown and sticky? A stick!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops