Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

A very ugly man with has sex with a lamb because he is so ugly. He subsequently gets ghonorhea and dies 2 years later of brain cancer.

i may not know where you sleep. but, i spiked your drink with sleeping pills

How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

A walrus walks into a bar

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

Why... ...did the chicken cross the road?

What did the white guy said to the black guy, when he stepped on his foot? Excuse me.

Why was 7 afraid of 6? Because 6 accused him of cannibalism

Why are chaos theorists so predictable? Because their arguments usually follow a logical set of points.

Why did the boy go to heaven? He was in an airplane.

What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

What's worse than getting Ebola? Nothing

Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

Knock knock. Whose there? Not my house so not my problem. Frankly, I don't give a shit.

Women

whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

YOUR MOM HAS A DICK IN HER ASSCHEEKS!!!

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

why did the frog cross the road it was stapled to a chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...