What did chuck Norris say to the docter Nothing he never has to go to a hospital

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

Jesse ziggenfat hates his life. He's really obese. Just like his mom...and his sister...and his brother.....and his dad.... And his dog? Bacon?

What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

A cup of ranch walks into a lemon

What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

Wanna hear 2 short jokes and a long joke? Joke, joke , joooooookkkeeee

Looks through the peephole.

What's a slang term for a really, really fat person? Overweight.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't reply because horses don't speak. However, he is confused and scared by the unfamiliar surroundings. Trying to escape, the horse breaks his leg. The horse must be put down.

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Wanna go bike riding?

I went to a hockey game and the strangest thing happened; 2 players got into a fight!

why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

Knock knock Who's there? Gung chee Gung chee who? That's my full name.

What's wrong with the beetles? They suck dick

Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

How many Germans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 5.

"I like my women like I like my spare tires, in the trunk of my car." -Paul Alangadan

Out on the playground of a school, extremely young kids are acting as living witness to an audacious thing. They're watching a very interesting display of strength and brutality. They're observing a enactment of lofty potential and great might. What're they watching? They're regarding their principal getting promptly arrested by the federal police for possession of technically illegal weaponry including, but not only limited to what looked like to them: peculiar "fire crackers" and reloadable "candy dispensers". In the ensuing battle, their principal got shot in the arm and a random pedestrian got killed by a stray bullet. In the end, the cruel joke's on them. Guess what? They're irrepairably damaged for the rest of their life.

Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

what's the difference between a white man and a black man? their skin color

how to you kill a black man. with a weapon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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