How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

What is the difference between assault and aggravated assault? Aggravated assault is aggravated, whereas assault is aggravated.

what is the awesomest of them all? me

Q: You know what's better and funnier than reading all these jokes A: GLEE and thats like singing and dancing :p JK it HAPPy tree friends LOOK IT UPPP!!!

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your boobss.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A Pokemon pencil!!! A Pokemon pencil who? I just found a Pokemon pencil next to my computer when I was playing pokemon!!! LMFAO!

What did the cop do when he saw two Mexicans buying coke? Warned them of the health risks of drinking carbonated soft drinks.

The bird is not the word.... Its two

Jesse ziggenfat hates his life. He's really obese. Just like his mom...and his sister...and his brother.....and his dad.... And his dog? Bacon?

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because it was a hammer.

I used to fit trough doors, but then I got tall... I used to play with other babies, but then I got tall... (daradadadadan) I used to look up to you, but then I got tall (OH YEAH!) but then I got tall, but then I got tall, but then I got tall! Moral: Censorship should be illegal.

whats blue and fluffy? your mothers chest hair!

poop

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

What did the doctor say when he lost his glasses? Where are my glasses?

Why did the chicken cross the road To get to your house Knock knock: whos there? The chicken duh

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why don't you ask him, o wait he's a chicken, you cant ask him. he is incapeable of speaking.

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the real mccoy

That awkward moment when the moment isn't awkward.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

WHat is worse then Fred singing and cumy condom

What's the tallest building in the world? A library cause it has so many stories get it haha.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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