Why did little Johnny eat his homework? Because his family is very poor and he rarely eats.

Roses are red Violets are blue Today is your birthday So happy birthday

Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

If a dyslexic man walks into a bar, check your notes. You told the joke wrong.

What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

What do you call a pig sizzling in a pan? BACON!

Are you from Nebraska? 'Cuz you're the only ten i see.

GUYS! I GOT AN A IN MY PIANO EXAM!!!!!

"Hello." "Hi."

Knock knock? Who is there? Nobody. Those were noises coming from your head.

What's the difference between a cow and a purple sweater? They're both purple Besides the cow

A day without sunshine is like night.

Boy: Is your body from McDonalds ? Girl: Aww is it because your lovin' it? Boy: No, it's because your greasy and fat!

Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

Obama

This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A person with light, yellowish hair who has a tragic genetic deformity.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

96

What do you call a black priest? Religious.

What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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