Did you hear about the homeless man? He asked me if I had any spare change. I didn't. I found the encounter to be very depressing.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why can't helen keller skii? Because she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between a black man and a bunk bed? A bunk bed is stable and can support two children.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman all walked into a bar. But, the bartender was not happy, as he had noticed that each of them were wearing tops with rude slogans on them. The Bartender said to the Englishman, "you do know that your t-shirt isn't suitable for the children in here, don't you?" "Oh," said the Englishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home to change it at once." Next, came the Irishman, who's top was slightly worse than the Englishman's. The bartender said to the Irishman, "you do know that the joke on your jumper is sexist, don't you?" "Oh," said the Irishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home and change it at once." Last, was the Scotsman. The Scotsman's top was particularly bad, and the bartender especially did not want this top to be seen in his bar. So, the bartender said to the Scotsman, "you do know that the slogan on your cardigan is racist, don't you?" "Oh," said the scotsman, "I'll go home and change it at once."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

My Japanese girlfriend just broke up with me. It's okay, there's more of them in the sea.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

An blind orphan in an impoverished Irish village develops both AIDS and terminal cancer. You laughed a little at that. You are going to hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A jewish man is sitting on a bench. A german man then proceeds to sit down next to him. They say nothing to each other.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

WILSON!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Lil' Wayne

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Chuck Norris' farts are silent and deadly. Deadly because he's Chuck Norris, silent because his butthole is extremely loose

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What noise does a dead dog make ? Nothing its dead

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled yo his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What's the difference between a wire fence and a wooden fence? You can't see through a wooden fence

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

thumb_up thumb_down +48

The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

HARRY EFFING STYLES

thumb_up thumb_down +46

what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops