Why do Jews make sure their cars can stop on a dime? So if something happens unexpectedly when they are driving they have a better chance of avoiding a dangerous collision.

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How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

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Chaney is a dumb b****

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What do you call a Mexican with a Green Card? A hard working American Citizen

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How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

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your mom is so lesbian that in prder to have you she planted a seed in her vagina because she refused to have sex with a man

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A Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. What hit the wall first? Probably his penis.

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What did the black kid get for his birthday? A bike, just what he asked for.

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why did the boys voice get so deep? He just went through puberty

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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You know what I hate long anti-jokes that take up too much space.

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why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

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What's a ghost favourite colour? Ghosts don't exist.

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Unflushed Shit...

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What was the dying Raccoons last words? I don't want to die.

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your mom is so stupid, she once wrote a math test and didn't do very well.

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Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris

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Gestapo.

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What do you get if your mailman drops your letter in black paint? Blackmail

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What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

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How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

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Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

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Q: What is worse than bitting in to an apple and finding a worm? A: Bitting in to a worm and finding an apple.

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Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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