What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

Why is amouse afraid of cheese? Because they usually die when they get it

What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

How many Grand Jurists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on if it was a cop that snuffed out the light bulb.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

What's the difference between an old quarter and a new penny? 24 cents

why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

Why was Steve buried in Australia? Because he was dead.

What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

Knock knock *runs away laughing*

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

why did Max cry??? chicken

roses are red, violets are violet

oh hiya come in

Q: What is green, blue, white and red? A: They're colors

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cactus and you are a Jew EJ

a man runs into a bar and screams, he is sent to a doctor for a minor concussion and receives some stitches. He recovers over time and gets on with his life.

Who was worse than Hitler? Justin Bieber

A Mexican, A Jew and a Irishman walk into a grocery store...The Mexican buys some bread, the Jew buys some bread... and the Irishman buys some bread.

yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned about her health

who can jump higher than mount everest? anyone. mount everest cant jump

A man and woman are out to eat on their first date. When the woman goes to pay, the man explains that he will cover the cost of the meal. That's a good thing because the woman didn't actually have any money. This happens all the time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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