What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? a pizza doesn't yell when it goes into an oven

but there is a road to the super market

Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

What do you get with two banana peels? Compost.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

What is a mexicans favorite sport? Whatever he is interested in.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

Black people are innocent.

Myspace

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

Womens rights. Are extremely valuable because women are equal.

Why did the women keep scratching her head? Because she had lice

A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

why did the man come out of the closet? because the dark scares him and it smelled like moth balls

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...