what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

What color is cotton? White Well in Afrca, they grow black cotton

Dylan F is stupid He goes to his cousins house Then falls into a pit Moves on

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The grass is always greener on the other side.

human centipede

knock knock!? . . No.

How do you make an anti-joke offensive? Add racism to it.

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

Knock, Knock... Whose there? No one... you have no friends.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

my throat Really started to hurt, like reallly badly, and i remember On sponge bob, he laughed so much his laugh box broke. well, my throat really hurts. please help! can i get my laugh box back? will i never be able to laugh again and have to get it replaced like squidward did?!!? please answer, i have a friend who would probably give me part of her laugh box, but she Laughs like a hyena

Puns are terrible. I love them.

Q: Why did Hitler Kill himself? A: Because his wife couldn't match the pleasure of his massive Nazi Orgies

Why was the dog fallowing the fat guy. The fat guy said come.

a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because skeletons cannot live on their own and there is no such thing as a skeleton that can walk across roads without muscles.

How can you tell two twin sisters apart? Look at one twin, then look at the other, and acknowledge that they are two different people.

Why doesnt mexico have an olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump, or swim in already in america.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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