Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

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Have you heard that joke about Helen Keller? No. Neither has she.

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How do you become a dragon ball super saiyan? You sit there and scream like you are giving birth for three minuets

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What did Timmy want for Christmas? Parents.

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How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

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What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Douse it in gas and throw it in a fire

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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What do you call a blonde with a Doctorate in Physics? Doctor (Dr).

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why did the chicken cross the road? he saw a rather desperate looking homeless person coming towards him, and, realizing he had no change, figured it was the best way to avoid an awkward situation.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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A man walks into a bar. -Can I ask where am I? - he sais -Yes, you can. - sais the barman Awkward silence occurs. -Why aren't you asking? I said you can.

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So a man walks into a bar and gets a drink, then a man walks up to him and tries to start a fight, the first man says, "No thanks" and walks home.

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Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

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What happened when my familys break on the car didn't work? They rolled down a hill and fell off a cliff and died. I loved them.

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why did the white man read the New York Times? because HuffPo is horrible. I mean, it's so so so shitty. it's like a wannabe buzzfeed, which ought to say it all.

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... Chan chan

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a cop wrote most of these anti-jokes O.o

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A man walks into the bar and ask the bartender for a shot of vodka. He drinks the vodka.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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