A brick bent down to suck my flapjack, Then he got stuck, oh what the unpleasant, This angered the brick, he lay on the grass, he shoved a stick straight up his bellybutton.

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A man walked in to a bar, he ordered a few drinks, met some new friends and had a good laugh with them. Later that night, he got in his car and drove home, which was foolish, as he should have known that being under the influence of alcohol increases the percentage of a collision, which could take his life and the lives of others. He arrived home just fine and got in to bed with his wife who was happy to see him.

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bacon

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What's funnier than 24? My life.

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A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

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Set up Punch line.

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XD, Okay, but you gotta marry me too XD Its working again I am skipping class tonight, how about you come by uh, the day after tomorrow? And bring condoms I don't have any.

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Why doesn't Santa deliver gifts anymore? Because Santa died of a heart attack.

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? depends how big the car is!

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why did the boy get hit by a bus because he had ice cream.

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What happened when the woman sent back the pair of shoes she bought on eBay? She obtained a refund from the seller under eBay's return policy.

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Why weren't the two gays invited to the office party? Because there is no office party until december, therefor no one was invited.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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what did the addidas sign say to the nike sign? I'm all in

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What do you call a penguin that hangs around in playgrounds? A paedophile.

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DILDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Hey, I just met you... No, I'm your brother. You've known me for 30 years. You must have memory loss.

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How did the black man get into college? A mop.

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How do you kill a black man? feed him mayonase

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Q: Why did the crazy man stare at the orange juice container? A: Because it started talking.

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A special needs student walks into a girls change room, and is then escorted out unaware that what he did was socially unacceptable.

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How do you make a baby fly? Hit it's mother in the stomach.

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Q:where did the little kid go? A:wait, before or after i killed him

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This joke is the worst joke ever.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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