what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

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Whats better than having 5 dollars? Having 5 dollars and a pizza

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock. Knock. Whos there? Not Sarah.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Sasquatch. Sasquatch who? ROAR

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Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

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Why did a man get fired from the M&M store? He was color blind.

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if life thows you lemons ILLUMINATI CONFIRMED

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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Whats black and hanging from a tree in my backyard? A tire swing

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I am white, asian and black... What am I? A panda

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How dead people are in a graveyard? All of them

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set? Because she didn't.

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What do you call a girl with no arms and legs? Whatever her name is.

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Why did the boy fail his test? Because he got shot before he could even study.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 has been convicted on multiple accounts of murder and Grievous Bodily Harm

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Neo Nero, why did you not tell me that Nero7 is dead? When was the funeral held? Where is he buried? At point Zero? Please I need to know, he was basically my father, or rather all that my father never was, at least I dont have to wonder if he will ever come back... I understand your anger, even if I am not even close to following your extreme ideals, please tell me the code, the proof that you are not one of the Spetznas or the Nazi`s. "Eliza"

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What's sicker than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill death ratio

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you know whats worse than cantaloupe? no cantaloupe

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, the answer is to get to the other side, but this is an anti-joke site so I don't know why as it can't be it.

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Q. How many Jews can you fit in a blender ? A. 37 but you can try and prove me wrong

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why did billy fall down? Because he is mentaly retarted and was just plain stupid.

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When I exited the hospital one day, I spotted a sign saying "Come back soon!" Soon afterwards I saw people protesting to ban dihydrogen monoxide. The next day on tv I saw an ad for a solar powered lightbulb. Then I saw a Gun control poster. I cried, this being the dumbest thing I had seen yet, and the world was certainly doomed due to humanity's general stupidity. I saw a chicken crossing a packed road. Why did the chicken feel the urge to cross the road?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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