A man ate a lot of ice cream he had double bypass surgery 3 months later

Why are Jewish men curcumsized? Because Jewish women wont put their hands on anything that's not 20% off

Q:how many ping-pong balls do you need te get a crocodile off of a slide ? A:none, because an engine doesn't have doors

A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

Why did the child cry? It was beat up and thrown in a trashcan.

Dan was friends with Dick. Dick likes to give massages to Dan. Dan's favorite is Dickie's special mixture. He will remember Dick, his favorite personal assisatant for life. CREEPER

why harry potter, if he was a wizard?

What's green and has wheels? The Holocaust. I lied about the green and the wheels.

knock knock. Who's there? The delivery man.

Your Momma is so old, she started exercising more and eating healthier to increase the chance of her living long enough to enjoy your own children's lives.

How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You do not, as she is blind and deaf, and partaking in doing so would be the morally wrong thing to do.

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas. A: A bicycle.

Knock knock Who's there? Micheal Jordan. Micheal Jordan who? Your an idiot

hi

whats the difference between a pair of shoes, and a computer. alot.

What do you call a girl with no arms or legs on the beach? Sandy What do you call that girl tossed into the water? Sandy Duncan

What did the german get for christmas? an Easy-Bake oven and a G.I. Jew

Why don't people like this joke? It makes no sense.

why did Bernard have a bold because I ripped his Mohawk

How many jews does it take to stop hitler. no one knows they didn't

A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

What trees do fortune tellers look at? Whichever variety of species are indigenous to where they live.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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