What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

thumb_up thumb_down +38

There's no "i" in tim.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the man throw his watch out the window? Because it was broken.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or words that begin with "F" and end in "uck." So you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Q: What did the prostitute say to the other prostitute? A: I have AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why grannies do not buy a menstrual pads? Cause they will never have their period anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

oh hiya come in

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Do you know what would happen if you were to like this Anti-Joke? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... I would get another like.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

thumb_up thumb_down +30

yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned about her health

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's better than winning gold at the special Olympics? Not being retarded. - Blake Woodman

thumb_up thumb_down +30

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's the best position to be in while being attacked by a bear? invisible

thumb_up thumb_down +28

roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops