Why did the girl not have a good New Year's? She was murdered on Christmas.

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What did the boy Tell to his friends? Nothing. He has noone.

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Roses are red Dead bodies are blue You can't see me But I see you

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Why does an elephant lay on it's back with its feet in the air? To trip birds.

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C'est l'histoire d'un français paumé qui se retrouve sur un site anglais.

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a giraffe? A genetically unstable animal that dies shortly after birth.

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There was a girl who dumped her diver boyfriend because she couldn’t get him to give her a pearl out of an oyster. This particularly female has rather high expectations for her significant others.

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What's better than a pile of dead babies? Anything.

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Lol, thats sweet, you making me nervous in a good way now. No, the thing is that I need to use this crap every morning, yeah, but its late here now, and since I was born with this condition, remembering is far easier than forgetting, and while the bleeding has stopped now, I was never in any pain whatsoever, and the bleeding would have stopped eventually because of you know... Coagulation? But, if I lets say spend a week without my meds, things would look pretty ugly. I get the meds for cheap, by my new doctor since the old one was a bitch... Excuse me, can we take five minutes? I know I said I would return last time and did not, but I will, I am just a bit... Well, I need a bit more blood in my body right now, I am fine, no danger... If I where I would not be chatting here, but getting my ass of to the doc.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first one.

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What do you call a dead cat on the side of the road? Kitty litter

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Yo mamma's so black, and that's ok. We're all different and unique.

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What's as bad as doing something you don't like? Doing another thing you don't like

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A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from a sky-scraper Q:he dies

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Why doesn't Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesn't float!

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A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

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I'm not here.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Q:How many prostitutes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two

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A blond and a brunette fall off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Neither. They hit the ground at the exact same time due to the laws of physics

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Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

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yo mamas so ugly she turned madoosa into stone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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