One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

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The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

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why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

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What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

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Where did Jimmy go after the bombing? Everywhere.

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A man in a bar says "I'm drunk", immediately 10 men take of their clothes

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Q: What's the point? A: .

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Why did the man drop his glasses? His hand was sweaty.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the chicken fall off the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

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Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? because he was a happy guy

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Q:What did the cat say to the dog? A: Meow

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

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A man walked into the bar and ordered a drink, drank it then stood up and left remembering that he once had a drinking problem and had overcome it.

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Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

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two muffins are in an oven one muffin says man its pretty hot in here and the other muffin says oh my god a talking muffin

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what do you get when you cross a pig with a bunny? Nothing.Crossing a pig with a bunny is impossible.

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What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Make his family cry!!!!!!!!!

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Why do white people wear black shirts? Why do black people wear white shirts?

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What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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