Your Mother is so stupid that not only can she not peform basic mathematical sums, but she frequantly makes spelling errors

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Guess what?? What? I murdered your mother with a slimy piece of ham.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Q: What do you call a white sheet on the floor? A: A ghost costume, dirty laundry, or carpet are all perfectly adequate answers.

thumb_up thumb_down -86

Your mom was so stupid that she went back to school and now she is graduated with a degree.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

Guess what? What? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Batman and Robin are about to get into the Batmobile. What does Batman say? "Get in the car Robin."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: A serial killer B: I don't feel comfortable opening the door

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why is the world flat? I don't know ask the Native American who was curious enough to take his canoe, go out into the middle of the water and never come back.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a plane full of Arab guys? Something not so good.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Why doesnt mexico have an olympic team? Because all the mesicans that can run, jump, and swim are already in the U.S.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

:(Sneeze) :Bless You :Thank You! :Mention it :Thank You!

thumb_up thumb_down -87

1unno;njfjk

thumb_up thumb_down -133

What did a child without arms and legs get for Christmas present. Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +124

There's a fair in a small town in Scotland. In this fair is a sheep judging contest. There are 3 sheep lined up for judging. The judge looks at the first sheep and says "Wow! This is the most beautiful sheep I've ever seen! This sheep just might win!" Then he proceeds to the second sheep. He says "This sheep is even more beautiful than the first! This sheep just might win!" Then he goes to the third sheep. He says "UGH! This is the ugliest most disgusting sheep I've ever seen! There is no way this sheep will win this contest!" And the sheep looks up at him and says, "You think I'm ugly? Well I'm not."

thumb_up thumb_down +64

A baseball player hits a home run and wins the game for his team, when he arrives back home expecting to see his mother and father, he remembers they both died in a car crash several years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

8============D PEN1S

thumb_up thumb_down -64

A man walks into a bar. He meets this attractive female. They later go to his house to have sexual intercourse. However, the man forgot to use a condom. He finds out he got AIDS. He dies twenty years later from his sexually transmitted disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Whats worse that stubbing your toe? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

How did the baby cross the road? The baby got stapled to a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do u tourcheer a fat kid? Make him chase a dounout

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why didn't the [any object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. Why didn't the [other object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. [repeat ad infinitum]

thumb_up thumb_down -35

haikus are easy but sometimes they make no sense refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops