Roses are red Violets are blue Fvck this poem I'll just go play video games.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Plenty of things but you already knew that.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens have short memories and no motivations other than food.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Billy had a dream. He saw himself becoming rich and famous. He drove an expensive car and lived in a mansion. His career reached its peak and he was accused by the media of having numerous sexual relations and drug problems. After 3 years of rehab he made an excellent comeback tour in which his name made it back onto the front pages and his respect regained. In his later years, he died of an accidental drug overdose and his loyal fans pay tribute to him every year. But this will never happen to Billy. Billy is a cactus.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

josh roberts goes into churches and forces them to listen and go by his religious opinion until they cry

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How did mary and molly have sex it is impossible for two women to perform sex

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why are the inside of a black guys hands white? Because he has worked really hard for his whole life.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What doesn't kill you makes you...... A paraplegic

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did phil ruin the patio furniture? because he wasnt familiar with the grammar technique used

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Hey, you know what'd be funny? A guy having a seizure saying, "Help I'm having a seizure!"

thumb_up thumb_down -114

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

What's red, black, and blue all over? A canvas with red, black, and blue paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Why werent you at my party? Becasue there was none!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What was the blind man doing at the movies? He was on a date.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A zookeeper, a shoemaker, and a guy named Billy Jones walks into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we closed". So they left.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

knock knock. whos there? ............... stupid kids

thumb_up thumb_down -28

I am just not using any mentalism nor any of those techniques anymore that is all, is it alright if I call you now?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Dad: "When I was your age, I had to walk outside to catch the school bus. If it snowed heavily the night before, school was canceled."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Click click ,scroll scroll. Bro you wasted your time. -Troll Lord

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A traveling salesman breaks down on a rainy night, but spies a farm house. he knocks on the door and the farmer answers. the salesman asks if he can spend the night. the farmer says "sure, but i gotta warn you, i don't have any daughters."

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Roses are red and blue Violets are red and blue Those 3D glasses really suck.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops