Knock knock Who's There? My name is Jeff

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was crossing the road it tripped on a rock. When it was getting back up, a bus went through a stop sign and ran it over. After suffering for 3 weeks in an animal hospital, the chicken died.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A penguin bikes to a bakery, the baker asks him "what kind of bread do you want?" Penguin replies "it doesn't matter, im biking"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Three men are walking and one falls over, he then gets up and continues walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +203

If a tree falls on a woman, and there's no one around to hear it, what was a tree doing in the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what did the asian father say to his son after seeing he got a B- in math? "There's small room for improvement but overall you did a great job son."

thumb_up thumb_down +200

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Sorry, we don't allow horses in here." The horse then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why are black people so stupid an lazy? They aren't. This is a negative social stigma and if you believe it you are a racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -75

what did say when he created the first black Wow you are the first non-white I made

thumb_up thumb_down +18

You hear a big Boom, and run in, and see a shattered toilet, and a very BIG dying woman, on the floor next to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -186

When u outside and the suns out.....stand under raysean u will see a solar eclispe

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty jumped off and committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the boy sad. Because he had been diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and he had been told he has three days to live. That's why.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

did you here the one about the disabled downs child dying? of course you didn't that would be a horrible joke

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than the Holicost? Bitting into an apple and finding a worm

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Doctor, I keep imagining Doctors. *hayball rolls*

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a male dog and a female? One is a bitch. There are numerous other differences.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

1unno;njfjk

thumb_up thumb_down -162

If I could rearrange the alphabet I probably wouldn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

hi iggy

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian find a magical lamp with a genie inside. He offers each of them one wish. The Muslim wishes that people didn't look at his people as terrorists. The Jew wishes that the Holocaust never happened, and the Christian wishes for world peace. Actually this didn't happen, Genies don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

roses are red violets are blue you should have been aborted

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's red ad spins in circles? A baby with it's head nailed to the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops