When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I am homeless, Can I have some food?

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and have a conversation and eventually they leave.

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pup

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What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so they can be used interchangeably.

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why did the girl fell off the hammock? because she didn't have arms and why didn't she got up? 'cause she had no legs and why didn't anyone helped her? 'cause she had no friends and why did she die? 'cause she fell into a puddle facing down

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A penguin bikes to a bakery, the baker asks him "what kind of bread do you want?" Penguin replies "it doesn't matter, im biking"

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Knock knock. Come in. You're under arrest for second degree murder.

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What is big, black, and hairy? A coconut.

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Why are elephants ears sooo big? The big ears are to help the elephants stay cool. Elephants don't sweat, so they have a hard time dissipating excess heat (keeping cool). Their large ears contain many blood vessels that allow heat to escape into the air. When you see elephants they are usually moving their ears back and forth. This fanning helps to dissipate more heat than if their ears remained still. The enormous ears of elephants act as cooling devices. The gigantic earflaps (which can measure up to 2 square metres (21.5 square feet) are equipped with an intricate web of blood vessels. When the animal flaps its ears, the blood temperature lowers by as much as 5 degrees Celsius (9 degrees Fahrenheit). To keep cool

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When u outside and the suns out.....stand under raysean u will see a solar eclispe

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Q: why did the plane crash? A: because jack daniels equals 7

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense Microwave

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Why couldn't little Billy jump? He was dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally!

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Three men are walking and one falls over, he then gets up and continues walking.

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Three men are in prison and comparing crimes. The first says that he got three years and he never robbed that store. The second says he served six years and he never hit that lady. The third said he got life, and he killed every child in that orphanage.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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tom hall

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's cheese.

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Why was the boy sad. Because he had been diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and he had been told he has three days to live. That's why.

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what did the asian father say to his son after seeing he got a B- in math? "There's small room for improvement but overall you did a great job son."

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Sorry, we don't allow horses in here." The horse then leaves.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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