What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a porch? Bob

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A horse walked into a barn...

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Why are Jews so tight with there money? They want to be finanically stable and provide a future for their familys.

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Jews who wear penny loafers...

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Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

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What do you tell a woman with no black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice but you're not an abusive partner.

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Anti jokes are funny, but also not.

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square circles have souls but gingers do not CC

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Female Athletics

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what did liam weir ask ethan. how much charge do you have

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What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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Women's Rights...

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a Jewish preist grew up in a black family. what do you call them? a loving family.

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What did the dog say to its anus? Woof

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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What's gay and gay? Joe

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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I love you.

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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