On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

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How do you know that your at a gay barbecue? Because, the hot dogs taste like shit!

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Knock, knock Who's there? Who. Who who? ... Who?

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What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

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Why do Jews hate hitler? They are jealous of him.

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Itookasipasoda

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

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I'm funny.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock Who's there THE CHICKEN

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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What did one pole say to the other pole? We are both from poland

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What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

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A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

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A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

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What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

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What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops