#Last Christmas I gave you my heart #And as far as I know #The transplant was a complete sucess #And you have recovered from your operation #And are now well again #This year to save me from tears #I'll donate my kidneys

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Why did the gorilla have big nostrils? Because it was a trait passed on to him from his biological father.

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One sunny Tuesday morning, Tom and his friends were outside playing at the park. Then, suddenly, a violent storm was rapidly approaching. It was recommended that everyone should seek shelter immediately.

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Why can't the black person drown? He is very well trained at swimming.

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what does the muslim guy say in a very busy metro station? jaallalalalalalalalla BAM

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Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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''Today is Star Wars day :)'' ''Why's that?'' ''guess'' ''I don't know :/'' ''It's May the 4th!'' ''And?'' ''May the 4th be with you :p''

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Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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What's worse than being eaten by a giant bear? Hitler.

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What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes.

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Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

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roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

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Whats long and red all over? This Cut on my arm, i should get it checked out.

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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Why was the guy tired? His titties were too big

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you just read an anti-joke

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Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

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Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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What do you call a mormon in a red jumpsuit covered in black spots? Proper terminology for this scenario has not been yet made

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Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

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Why did the man leave anti-joke.com? Because he realized that it was time for dinner and the ham was burning.

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Why didn't the cat have any legs? Because it was a snake

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penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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