goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

What's the difference between a nutcracker and a can of tomato soup? Oh... I don't know, I was asking you.

What did the two Japanese men say to each other? I have no idea I don't speak Japanese

Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

Q. What do you call a person with no arms, legs, torso, or head? A. A mutilated corpse.

Women are like fish. It's hard to tell when they are crying underwater.

"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

Sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

what did the girl say when she lost her shoe where is my shoe

What did the Jew get for Christmas ....... An ashtray

I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Disabled.

What's in a bag of dead babies? Dead babies and one alive baby eating it's way out.

once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

roses are red violets are blue i have dementia its not funny

Q.what has big ears? A.your vagina.

What is a black, yellow like liquid that contains carbon dioxide, usually kept in a can, and is not coke? Pepsi.

How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

whats a porn stars favorite number? 69...

What did the Muslim say to the American? Hi

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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