What do you get when you cross a blonde with Nickelodon? You get Dora because she is allways telling you what to do.

You wanna hear an inside joke? That was one of them.

what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

whats forever alone me

I heard you like playing basketball at night. My ears are fully functional in comprehension of human language and therefore I am able to listen and remember words that are told by others.

How do you divide 2574 by 23.5 WIth a calculator

if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

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What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

im gay because im gay

Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout boy scouts come back from camp

A man goes to Church he meets God nothing happens

Why was the baby smoking? He was locked in a hot car.

Why is One direction the best thing in the world? Becuz when 5 hot guys met each other they... Sorry I got lost in Zayn's eyes again! Now what were we talking about??????

What do you tell a black man walking down the street with a suspicious look to him. Hey, how's it going?

why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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