i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

A fat man takes a crap, it looked like something a rhino would curl out.

*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

What did the convicted necrophiliac pedophile do when he found a dead baby? He reported it to the authorities because despite his past habits and behaviour, and after years of rehabilitation he became a responsible and considerate citizen

How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. He might have trouble focusing, but his ADHD in no way prevents him from completing such a task.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

Guy 1: That's what she said! HAHAHA!!! Guy 2: That's what who said? Guy 1: I don't know. :/

Knock knock. It's me, the ratboy genius.

Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Q. Why did the friend say to the other friend "Your soo gay!" A. Because he was gay..

What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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