Where is my tractor?

Yo Momma's so fat she has Type 1 Diabetes.

A baby seal walks into a club...

How many boring people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

What's brown and sticky? a stick

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

What has four legs, is green and furry, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

Want to hear a joke? I'm sorry.

Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

That other group is a *********************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************** From Jackson Edwards

a women walks into a room and says she got a good job..wait thats not possible..

whats 2+2? gonorrhea.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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